** MUSINGS FROM THE HEART **

Hello, Alert Readers!

I am sitting here in tears watching a movie about a teenage girl who is being bullied by her "best friends". They have spread vicious rumors about her, sent lying texts and emails about her to the whole class at school, made fun of her openly, etc. I don't know why in the world I started watching this movie, and should totally turn it off right now- but it is something like seeing a train wreck: I can't seem to look away. I can somewhat relate to this girl.

In my Senior Year, one of the boys in my class got a sudden "crush" on me. Because my long-time boyfriend and I had broken up, this guy figured I'd be "easy pickin's" and decided that HE'D be the one to do the "pickin'". When it became clear to him that I was not interested, he began to spread stories about me, really nasty stories. I was fortunate, though, because my good friends DID NOT believe him, and stood by me. But it was very hard to walk down the halls at school and see the looks and hear the whispers from the OTHER kids. It took about two tough months before the kids moved on to another topic, and the guy's stories forgotten.  I'm sure there were some who still believed those lies, and maybe still do -50 years later- but it doesn't matter at all, of course. And, believe it or not, the guy had the nerve to actually ask me to "friend" him on Facebook!!!!  Yeah, right!

I was always a "big" girl. Not obese –like today- but bigger around than any of my friends. This brought an onslaught of insults (phrased as "jokes") from even my best friends. I'd laugh it off- but it ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS hurt.  And I still remember that hurt. Even on my mission, there were those who teased me about my weight. I would love to show you pictures of me in High School, BYU and on my mission. I was NOT FAT! But I was also not thin, lean, lithe, slender, etc. And emaciated models were (still are!) the ones society looked up to. I never felt beautiful until my Denny came into my life. He loved me –all of me- right from the start, and loves me –all of me- now. His sure love has helped me to find the beauty in myself. He is my Knight in Shining Armor . . . and I love and appreciate him more each day. THUMP! THUMP! THUMP go the strings of my heart!

I have never been physically abused in my whole life. But emotional and social abuse is just as dangerous. Bullying of any kind is dead wrong. My heart aches for any kid facing this kind of abuse. It can ruin a kid's childhood, schooling, social ability and make him/her feel "less" of a person.  I can only hope that someone wonderful like my Denny will come along into a bullied person's life and show him/her how wonderful he/she is.

Thank you, my love. Our 47^th Anniversary is coming up on June 9^th. If I had to choose again, it would still be YOU! You are my angel. I will love you for all of eternity.

That's it for today, Alert Readers. Love you all!  Sue ;)

MEMO TO MY BODY

MEMO TO MY BODY: It's time to get real. I've HAD it! You are a wonderful gift from our Heavenly Father, and I appreciate all of the exquisite and not-so-exquisite experiences you have provided for me. I remember the youthful years when you would do just about anything I would ask of you: running, jumping, swimming, diving, floor-sitting, dancing –oh, especially dancing!- and, yes, even cheer-leading. As I got older (and lazier), you began to "go south". Not your fault, body. Mea culpa. Chocolate, butter, gooey hamburgers, etc. added immense weight to your frame, slowing you down and creating a REAL problem with your arthritis. In 1999, I finally got FED UP with your size and immobility and changed my lifestyle. It took about a year and a half, but you cooperated, body, and shed 189 pounds. I felt much better and was able to get around more easily.

You and I worked together and kept the weight off for a few years- but bit by sneaky bit, I added a few cookies, a taste or two of ice cream, some cake and the occasional-to-frequent bite of candy to my diet, and the weight crept up and up again. It never reached its highest point again, but was still out of control.

Then we moved to Mesa. I greatly missed my beloved friends from Santa Monica, and the Young Women who had been a center point in my life for years. I missed my teaching at the LDS Institute, and the wonderful young people who were there. I missed having my family nearby (we moved to Mesa, near where Denny's family lives). Evidently I replaced lost sociability with food . . . because the weight crept up and up again.

Anyway, here we are again: needing a substantial lifestyle. My arthritis is worse than ever. Something is wrong with my left side: my knee (replaced 2 years ago) is aching, especially when I sit down or walk. Walking out of the Temple after our evenings shifts is really, really difficult. By the time we reach our car in the parking lot, I am in tears. OUCH!  Had to take a three-month Leave of Absence from the Temple. Not happy about that!

We saw our orthopedic surgeon, who took ex-rays. Nothing was evident- so he sent us to get a bone scan. The scan was really hard to do. I had to lie completely still, with my feet held together with an elastic band. The first two scans were only 6-7 minutes, but then came the 20 minute one! YIKES! Then when that was over, there were two more short ones. THEN, the tech came in to tell us that we were going to have to do the long one again, because it didn't take! DOUBLE YIKES!!!!  We excused ourselves to go the restroom before I had to get back in the machine. When we got back, the tech said we didn't have to do it again after all!!!!  They had enough "takes". YAY! 

The doctor my ortho surgeon wants to "read my scans" is out of town until Wednesday, so we won't get the results until we see my surgeon on Thursday. He told us that if this scan shows no problem with my knee, it's probably something to do with my L4.  (?)  Oh joy!  Will that mean back surgery?   AAAAAAAAACK!!!!!

Okay, enough about that! 

Our beautiful Rory came over yesterday and we had such fun with her! When she forgets what she's doing, she WALKS two-four steps. She sprint-crawls EVERYWHERE!!! She is so stinkin' cute! She knows where her toys are, and crawls to get them. She pulls out her favorite toys, and knows how to work them. She and I have a little "game" we play with one of her toys. We play "peek-a-boo" with a set of plastic keys. She hands them to me and I run them across her little face, asking, "Where's Rory?"  Then again and again. She takes them from me for a second, but then holds them up me and sticks her cute little face out to play again. Really cute!  And with Papa, when he slaps the couch cushions, Rory crawls right over and slaps them too. They play "percussion" so fun! Also, we noticed yesterday that if we ask, "Where's Papa?", she looks right at him. She looks right at me when we ask, "Where's GG?" We sooooooooo enjoy having her come over. She is the bright spot of our lives. LOVE her!

Ali, Andrew, Nick, Emily, Denny and I all went to Red Mountain High last night to see Trevor in "Grease". It was so fun to watch him! The live production is very different from the movie, and that made it even more interesting! ;)

Okay- that's it for the day. I know- not much interesting stuff here. But we'll try it again another day!!!!!  SEE YA'LL LATER!  Sue ;)

** RORY AND THE "EESTER BUNNY" **

MONDAY, APRIL 1, 2013

Gud affernoon, my GG'g Alurt Reeders!  Yep!!!! It's Rory! Yesturday was sumthing speshul called "Eester". There was nice musik at Church, and the laydies were wearing pritty dresses. Some even had flowers! I have kinda a hard time sitting "quietly". I am a gurl hoo likes to be mooving all the time. My Mama and Daddy take me out to the hall sumtimes, and I try reel hard to be gud. But Mama just sighs and mentions sumthing about "nurshury in a few months."

After church, ALL of my Mama's fambly went to my PapaGG's house for dinner! It was so fun being with everyone. All of my grown-ups seem to be happy to see me. They pass me around and around until each of them hugs and kisses me. I wiggle and wiggle around because I want to get down on the floor to play with my toys. My Grandma took me to sit on the floor by my PapaGG's fireplace and I found TOO presents for me left by "The Eester Bunny". There was a kute Little Mermade doll and a reely fun turtell that rolls around and makes noises. It is reely fun, and I like to follow affer it.

We played for a little bit- and then we ate dinner. I sat in my high chare and my GG fed me sum green beens and karrots. THEN she took some fun food from her OWN plate and let me taste it. My Grandma, Grandpa, Papa and GG were all at the table where I was sitting- and they all thot it was reel fun to watch me eet "reel" food. I must have made sum funny faces, becuz they laffed at me. GG said they had chicken salid, potato salid, eggs, awlives, tomatoes, cheez. crossants, and punch.

After dinner, most of my grown-ups did sumthing kawled an Eester Egg Hunt. Everybody except my PapaGG, Grandma and Grandpa ran all over the house hunting for things. There were differnt colors of plastik eggs full of sweet stuff. Also, there were choclit bunnies, and other little boxes of things. Everybody had a reely fun time- and so did I! I krawled around, following them all. Peepul kept kalling, "Watch out for Rory!" "Don't step on the baby!" But I don't know what the konfushun was all about- becuz nobuddy stept on me at all!

After the "hunt", we all sat around the living room and tawked. I played with my toys and krawled around from grown-up to grown-up . . . espeshilly when my Grandma gave everyone a bowl with strawbury shortkake in it! There was this white fluffy stuff on top that looked gud!  THEN I reely krawled around. All of my grown ups gave me bites from their bowls, and I LOVED it!

I love my grown ups verry much. They are all so gud to me. I like to play with them, and I will even share my toys with them! I know that my PapaGG would like to play with me more . . . but GG can't get down on the floor with me, and I usually krawl to the peepul on the floor and play with them. But I get to play with PapaGG when I stay with them one day a week. ;)  Gotta go. I need a nap, Mama sez. Luv you all!  Rory  ;)